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the growing gap: alex mustard dived 80 ft. into the crevice between the north american and eurasian plates near iceland to capture these spectacular photos. the area is riddled with faults, valleys, volcanoes and hot springs, caused by the tectonic plates pulling apart at about one inch per year.
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spectacular pic, spectacular perception.
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as within, so without…
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i came toe to toe with the gap as it was manifest within me on thanksgiving morning, 3 a.m. 2010. not yet fully awake i was conscious of being semi conscious while experiencing the most potent force of darkness and evil for which i have no words. standing on the edge of darkness i looked into what appeared to be an endless, infinite chasm containing… just barely… a force so potent, so heavy, so huge… endless really… who’s only purpose was to annihilate me. and by this i don’t mean just kill me, no i mean ANNIHILATE me totally, to ensure not only that i died, but that i NEVER EXISTED. it was thanksgiving day at my mother’s house and i could think, feel, nothing else and could not speak because, who in my midst of these stoic new englanders could grasp this? once again, in a crowd and alone. a loneliness made all the more acute by the awareness of the existence of this living seething space that affects all.
the gap is a living force that is a location… an ever widening split within the consciousness or psyche of this creation made manifest inside and outside us in the environment and all around in a multitude of different ways.
it is fed and grows by the splitting and negation of ourselves and our creations. how do we split? whenever we say one thing and do another, stifle creativity, discard and ignore, or worse… try to obliterate that which we don’t want to see, understand or give compassion to. we do this every day, in so many different ways that are acceptable and encouraged — we are blind to it. it is the sum total of all of the abandonment and absence of love ever experienced and felt by all of us for eons. now in overload status, this amassed force has built to critical level and is manifesting in more and more attention demanding ways. simply put, the gap is the complete absence of love. and we, humanity, are clueless — all we know, see, is that we are having more and more difficulty “holding it together.”
this experience being new, and unwieldy to say the least, i called a girlfriend healer from santa fe, robin duda, for insight. she said, “oh yes, that’s the gap… and “the right use of will” book 4, has an in depth explanation of it.”
so i had a new mission: a project to dive into the gap. to do so, i had to travel back to the desert to my family of choice for support and facilitation to transform what we could of that space. i did go, the end of january, for 10 days of intensive life and soul altering work. it was all so very amazing and worth it 1000 times over. great love and thanks to my beloveds, robin, joseph, diana, harriette and aharava… and the gap.
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as i say, the path is in the pathology. but the gap, well the gap is best not handled alone or with the uninitiated.
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bless,
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right use of will, ceanne derohan: http://www.rightuseofwill.com/books.htm
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